Bekah's Heart, Devotional, Just Write

Planning Peace

“… Joy fills hearts that are planning peace.”

Proverbs 12:20b

What might it look like to plan for peace this week?
Peace in relationships?
Peace at work?
Peace in your mind or heart or soul?
Peace in your home?

Is it something practical like planning ahead for dinner on a busy night to decrease stress or anxiety when that busy moment comes?

Is it crafting in little 5 minute moments (or 1 minute even) where you can just stop and connect with Jesus, notice how you’re feeling, and invite him in to whatever activity is taking place?

Is it choosing words carefully with your family member/friend/teammate in order to add peace instead of anxiety or conflict to a situation?

As I ponder what “planning peace” may look like (and why that brings joy) I’m struck by all the things that are the opposite of peace. There are many antonyms. It could be strife or discord in community. It’s a restlessness in our souls. Distress in our mind. Anxiousness in our emotions. It could even me a messy or loud house that feels in-peaceful.

While in one way that seems overwhelming to think of all the ways we can experience the opposite of peace, it also gives us many areas, big and small where we can start planning for it.

For me this morning, that planning starts as simple as believing peace may be possible this week. To trust that the Prince of Peace is on His throne and on the scene in my life. To hope that peace might settle in a little more into my soul, into relationships, into my work and my play… and that as it does, it might bring with it a little joy.

Bekah's Heart, Blog News, Just Write

Places Matter – Here’s to Writing Again

This blog has been a little neglected lately with so much of my time and attention taken in the last couple of years by a new job and grad school. Now that graduation has passed and I find myself with a little more time here and there, my hope is that I can return here more often.

Last week I had the chance to vacation in a town I called “home” for 9 years. Visiting with friends who have become like family, exploring favorite spaces (and a few new ones), and eating familiar foods was so good for my soul.

It’s also always a little weird going back to a place that once was home, but is no longer. Things change. People change. We change.

My favorite coffee shop that I would frequent on my days off is now closed.

The church where I served has so many new members and new staff.

The parks I frequented look completely different (or were seemingly impossible to enter for my now unfamiliar mind due to changes to parking and roads).

As I wandered along the Niagara River, a spot I visited probably over a hundred times in the not-quite-a-decade I lived there, I was overwhelmed by this concept of how places are just places YET places matter.

I found myself pondering the hundreds of miles I had walked along that path with friends. Conversation after conversation drawing each relationship closer. I thanked God for those friendships, some of which are still close and some with people I never really get a chance to talk to anymore, all of which have changed in some way since geographic location no longer allows us to quick meet up for a River walk.

I thought of my exchange daughter and the way this path was near her school. It runs past an ice cream shop where her best friend worked, where we shared many ice cream cones. I recalled the day, a year and a half after she left that, she came back to America without me knowing and worked with some friends to surprise me when she joined our picnic.

I thought about the thousands of prayers I prayed in the years I lived near this place and would walk here multiple times a week. Joyous moments, heartbreaking moments, hundreds of little seeds of hope planted in situations of my own or people I love. And as the sun began to set, I recalled hundreds of past sunsets and this truth settled in to my heart:

Places matter.

They are just places. They change. People come and go. Yet, the things that happen there, the memories, the slight little shifts in heart and mind (whether for the good or bad) do indeed shift us, shape us, form us.

That’s what THIS little place, this blog has done for me over the years as well. In some seasons I showed up here daily and others only a few times a year. But through time, through the writing and the sharing and the mistakes and the celebrations, this little space of the internet has shifted things in me, shaped me, formed me.

I’m not sure what it means to return to this place after nearly two years of neglect. I’m different. My life rhythms are different. I don’t know how often I’ll write and I fear saying I’ll come back here often and then actually not doing that.

But for what it’s worth today. I’m simply reminding myself that this place matters and I hope to start showing up here more often again to see how it grows me as I have grown.

To memories made and memories yet to be captured.

To processing life and sharing what I learn.

To not having all the answers but journeying through life in the hopes of stumbling into some together.

To reminding myself once again that there is joy and blessing to be found in this life and it grows when we share it!

Welcome home… to myself.

Bekah's Heart, Mental Health

Rest While You Work

By now most of you know I love Sabbath and talk about it a lot. I also know that there are times and seasons when it looks different. Sabbath looks different for me as a single woman than my friends who have toddlers running around or have kids in sporting events. Also, there are moments, like the couple of weeks I’m currently living in, where if I were to try to actually get 24 hours away from all work (my job, grad school, housework, outside commitments) I would actually be more stressed out and less rested.

This is where this concept comes into play: if work is necessary, consider if there is a restful way to do the work.

The kids still have to eat and the tasks still need to be done and crises still occur. Just because work is required does not mean we just give up all hope for Sabbath.

For me today, finding a restful way to work meant taking my homework to my favorite coffee shop in Lincoln. My normal Saturday routine involves doing my grad school homework with various house chores scattered throughout the day as my study breaks. I normally can get that all done by dinner and Sabbath until dinner on Sunday. However, last week and this week I have to work on Sundays. I did cut out some tasks or worked hard to get some of the housework done early. A block of 24 hours of rest is just not possible this weekend. (And forcing that feels WAY too legalistic.) I still can be intentional with my time in a way that leads my heart into rest even if my mind and body must still work some of that time.

Sabbath isn’t just a day, it’s also an attitude. It’s a way of life that says “I am not God”, a space to remember who I am and what is real. So, at times, I can trust God to bring that rest even while I work or seek it in the way I work.

I can find joy and delight in Him as I settle into a corner of my favorite coffee shop with a warm chai, a yummy breakfast treat, and sunshine steaming in the window while working on homework.

I can use study breaks to journal or read a favorite book instead of clean.

Maybe you can plan a fun, special, EASY meal in your work of feeding kids.

We can stop by a park between errands or pause work tasks to go for a quick walk.

Perhaps it’s the type of work that feels more restful. Last spring I needed to be at work on a weekend the day after graduation for RAs to turn in supplies and keys. I needed to be in the office but I didn’t have a specific task required besides being present and available when someone walked in. I used that time to redecorate my office, something that felt refreshing for me. Rest in the work.

I try, and hope I always try, to fight for space and time every week to step away in Sabbath. It’s important. It’s Biblical. It guards me against sin. It restores my joy. It strengthens me for the work ahead. I hesitate to even share this because the concept of “rest while you work” can easily feed or even justify our cultural push toward overworking.

But 24 hours for Sabbath is not always possible in this fallen world. It does not look the same in every season.

In those moments, we seek the attitude and mindset of rest and cling to truths like this in Exodus 33:14, where God says to Moses, “My presence will go with you, and I will give you rest.”

Sometimes we get to stop and rest. Other times God goes with us and gives rest along the way.

With all that in mind, what does rest look like for YOU this week?

Bekah's Heart

2021 – A Year to Know Jesus

As 2021 began my spiritual goals and hopes for the year all centered around knowing Jesus more. I wanted it to be a time where I intentionally focused on knowing this friend in new and different ways. This meant I spent a lot of time in the gospels of Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John. I listened to what he said, I read what he did, I saw how he interacted with others … over and over and over. (I read them each at least 8 times.) While I learned so much here are just a few recaps of what I learned about my friend Jesus or my interactions with him this year.

January – Jesus has authority … in his teaching, over wind and waves, over evil, in all things! Also, Jesus values JOY! He talks about it all the time!

February – I noticed where he spent his time. “To the river”; “the wilderness”; “walking along the shore”; “throughout the region”; “up on a mountainside”; peoples homes; the lake; “walking along”; “walking through the grain fields”; synagogue/temple; “sat beside the lake”, etc.

March – He is, even in His human nature so much more than I have thought Him to be. I know so little about my Jesus.

April – God goes before us/is ahead of us to prepare (Luke 22:10-12, Mark 16:4,7, John 14:1-3). “Glory” is a key focus of Jesus . The word is used 33 times in John’s gospel.

May – Jesus, you have my attention.

June – Obedience = Life. – Even if where God’s leading or what He is doing or asking me to do doesn’t make sense. He. Is. Faithful. He shows up and acts.

July – He loves me! God longs to prove himself faithful to us. (Luke 1:4; 2 Chronicles 16:9, and almost every page of the gospels describing Jesus’ life). He’s doing things to set us up for belief. (John 2:22)

August – His kingdom is one of power while focusing that power on love, freedom, and healing. “If you only knew the gift God has for you…” John 4:10

September – Jesus constantly faced opposition, hatred, and being trapped. Luke 11:54. When I experience these things, I am in ‘good company’. “My best hope is well kept in you…” – Every Moment Holy Prayer pg 200

October – He is enough. Studied the “I Am” statements in John. He longs for us to experience LIFE! “Zoe” used 36 times in John’s gospel. “Lord give us relief from our unbelief.” – Lysa TerKeurst “He fills my life with good things.” Psalm 103:5

November – “He wraps you in goodness, beauty eternal.” Psalm 103:5 “The Lord still rules from Heaven.” Psalm 116:46 – He rules while we wait for things outside our control. He loves “to the very end”! John 13:1b “You are entirely faithful.” Psalm 89:9

December – Jesus was adopted (by Jospeh). Jesus cared about the Kingdom. “Kingdom” is used 52 times in Matthew’s gospel alone. He longs for us to ask him for things and be persistent in prayer.

So there you have it… a quick summary of the things Jesus showed me about himself this year. So here’s my question: What is one thing you know about God/Jesus that you didn’t know when 2021 started or that he reminded you of this year?

Advent, Devotional

An Adopted Savior

Jesus was adopted.

It struck me in a new way today as I read through the genealogy in Matthew 1. The ancestry of our Savior was tracked through Jospeh. Mary is of course mentioned but it is Joseph’s family tree through which history ties Jesus back to King David back to Abraham.

It was Jospeh who named the child (at the prompting of an angel). It was Joseph who wandered to Bethlehem to register his family for the census and likely listed his family of three. Eight days later, Joseph was present as he presented Jesus in the temple, fulfilling the laws of circumcision, purification, and dedication. It was Joseph who listened again to the angel and led his family, including his adopted son, away from danger, becoming a refugee in the process. It was Jospeh who did this yet again a while before settling his family in Nazareth. It was Joseph who led his family in their faith, witnessed through little snapshots of their faithfulness including the annual trip to Jerusalem for Passover.

Scripture paints beautiful pictures of Mary’s deep love for her son all throughout his life, but today the deep love of Joseph, Jesus’ adoptive dad, is captivating.

What a faithful father.

He leads.

He protects.

He claims him as his own.

What a beautiful reflection of our Heavenly Father as well. One who doesn’t have to love us, but chooses to. One who claims us and leads us. One who protects and provides.

I can’t imagine how challenging it was at times to be “dad” to the Savior of the world. I’m grateful though today for Joseph’s example of faith and trust in our Faithful Father.

“So you have not received a spirit that makes you fearful slaves. Instead, you received God’s Spirit when he adopted you as his own children. Now we call him “Abba, Father.” For His Spirit joins with our spirit to affirm we are God’s children.” Romans 8:15-16

Bekah's Heart, Mental Health, Poetry/Songs, Prayer

Whatever Marks This Season (A Prayer for a Day Away)

At the start of 2021 I marked off 4 days in my calendar, approximately 3 months apart as days to step away, regroup, and reevaluate all aspects of my life. A day to simply rest or play or “go deep” or whatever my soul needs on that day.

The first one was to kick off the year, actually on New Year’s Day, dreaming and listening to what the year ahead may hold. The first days of April took me to a nearby lake where, as I sat down on a picnic table by the water, the words below found their way to paper.

My quarterly retreats will likely look very different but I’m pretty sure this prayer will be a consistent part in any day I desire to set apart. Maybe it’s useful for you as well…

A Prayer for Days Away

Jesus, I commit this day to You.
To the shaping of my life, my soul, my body, my plans.

A day to look back and remember
to recall Your faithfulness
to notice Your presence in each step
to bear witness to friends and celebrations.

A day to be present and rest
to be still and silent
to be loud and move my body
to simply be.

A day to look forward and dream
to make plans with Your Spirit’s help
to pray over what the next few months may hold
to trust for every step ahead.

In these moments may I feel the warm summer sun on my face,
crunchy fall leaves under my feet,
or the comfort of a blanket wrapped around me on a cold snowy day.
Whatever marks this season.

May the laughter be loud or the tears fall hard.
Whatever marks this season.

May I fast and pray
or delight in rich foods
or enjoy a simple picnic.
Whatever marks this season.

May this be a day of plans to follow and lots of words written or consumed
or a day to wander aimlessly where You would lead.
Whatever marks this season.

I release any expectations in this moment except this one:
to meet You here.

Like Mary at her Rabbi’s feet
I choose the one thing needful. (Luke 10:38-42)
Like Jacob wrestling until dawn
I will not let go unless You bless me. (Genesis 32:22:32)
Like Hannah who begged year after year
I pray with perseverance expecting days of joy. (1 Samuel 1-2)
Like Peter, James, and John, lead me up the mountain
to find “only Jesus”. (Mark 9:2-8)
Like David I pray,
“My heart has heard you say,
‘Come and talk with me.’
And my heart responds,
‘Lord, I am coming.’” (Psalm 27:8)

I am coming.
I am here…

This season in pictures…

a weary world..., Advent

O Come, Ye Unfaithful, Despairing, and Defeated

O Come, All Ye Faithful is one of my favorite Christmas hymns. The repeated refrain “O come let us adore Him” feels like it draws me closer and closer with each phrase. However, the first line struck me as odd when I heard it for the first time this season:

“O come, all ye faithful, joyful and triumphant.”

“More like unfaithful, despairing, and defeated” came my sarcastic side-comment. (There might have been an eye roll as well.)

The specific week leading up to that thought had been discouraging, specifically in all the ways I felt I hadn’t lived up to the call God had for me, the ways I had been unfaithful, the ways I was discouraged and lacking joy in that moment, the ways I felt anything but triumphant. It all led me to wonder…

Is there room for me? Can I come too?

I’m not trying to criticize a beautiful hymn I love, yet I think it’s missing part of the picture. God does long for the faithful, joyful, and triumphant to come, but that’s not all. Time and time again throughout Scripture we see that Jesus came to earth so that the outcast, lonely, and discouraged could also come. That’s what this Advent and Christmas season is all about.

Yes, there was room for me. The adoration called for in this hymn comes when we remember that our Savior was born to redeem our unfaithfulness. In that there is true joy and triumph. It’s not about our faithfulness, but His. God of God. Light of Light. He is steady and true. All glory to Him, the Word who appeared in flesh.

So yes, come, faithful ones… come, let us adore Him.
Come, also, unfaithful ones.

Come with your weary hearts and your stubborn minds.
Come adore Him.

Come defeated and discouraged, lonely and lost.
Come adore Him.

Come joyful ones filled with hope.
Come cautious ones filled with doubt.
Come adore Him.

Come strong ones and weak ones.
Come adore Him.

O come, ye unfaithful, despairing, and defeated.

Oh come let us adore Him, Christ, the Lord!

woman alone looking up at the sky; snow falling with trees around
Bekah's Heart, Devotional, names of God

Certain Uncertainties

“And so, Lord, where do I put my hope? Psalm 39:7a

“Where do we go from here?”
This concept is not foreign to any of us living through 2020.

As plans change by the hour and uncertainty feels like the only certainty, our hearts are left wondering “what now?”

Yet, when all our hopes and expectations are dashed, Jesus steps in as Hope himself.

Where do we go? Well, if nothing else we’ve figured out where not to go. Verse 6 lays out some of that:
“We are merely moving shadows, and all our busy rushing ends in nothing. We heap up wealth, not knowing who will spend it.”

Our hope is not in productivity or money. Nor is it in political leaders or a health care system. If our ultimate hope is in our plans or our people, even then we will often be left disillusioned, distracted, and disappointed.

And so…

And so, Lord, where do we go?

Where CAN we put our hope?

Our only hope is You. (Psalm 39:7b, 71:5)

And so…

“And so we have this hope as a strong and trustworthy anchor for our souls. It leads us through the curtain into God’s inner sanctuary. Jesus, [our anchor of hope] has already gone in there for us.” Hebrews 6:18b-20a

“And this is the secret: Christ lives in you, the hope of glory.” Colossians 1:27

31 Days of Joy, Bekah's Heart, Joy

NOT 31 Days of Joy

Something I’ve learned over the last few years and even in this month of trying to focus on joy is the importance of intentionality in choosing joy.

I’m also learning that there can be intentionality in choosing to stop things that aren’t bringing joy to my life.

I’m discovering this 31 Day Blog Challenge actually fits in that category.

I was so excited when the month started to center in on this topic and blog about my journey. While the focus of joy has continued strong and so has my desire to blog, the pressure of writing specifically about that topic and doing it every day has not proved to be joyful.

So, I’m abandoning ship. It happened unintentionally a few days ago when I simply forgot but it caused me to pause. So today I consciously decided to not force myself to keep going in this daily rhythm.

I am keeping the goal of writing more and I also have my ears and heart tuned in for concepts of joy. (For example, it’s been crazy to see that there hasn’t been a day since the start of October where the word joy or rejoice didn’t show up in my daily Bible reading. It’s literally been there every single day.)

So yes. Joy and blogging remain goals but I’m choosing to actually LIVE in joy by putting aside an arbitrary expectation that wasn’t helping me live the very thing I was writing about.

This leads to my questions for you today…

1. What are the things that brought you joy this week?

2. What’s something you may need to stop because it is not adding value, meaning, or joy to your life?

31 Days of Joy

Joy in Imperfection

I hated last night’s blog post.

I loved the topic. I was honest in everything I said. I just didn’t feel like a good post to me. I wanted to delete it. I wanted to at least start over or maybe put it off and try that topic again a different day. I wanted perfection.

I posted it anyway.

There have actually be many in this month I haven’t really liked.

I’ve posted them anyway.

I feared that they aren’t as good as some of my other posts and wondered if people will be annoyed.

I keep posting anyway.

And I keep posting imperfect blogs because the whole point of this 31 blog challenge was to enjoy writing more and to focus on joy. If I stress myself out every night trying to get the “perfect post,” I’m not attaining either of those things.

Joy in imperfection means “okay” is okay.

Joy in imperfection means I have grace for myself (and not just in blogging).

Joy in imperfection allows space to grow.

Joy in imperfection feels approachable and real.

So even though I want to give up and abandon ship on this #31daysofjoy challenge, I will keep showing up. Because even in this, I’m discovering joy.