Tag: lent

Lent, Prayer

Can I Just Get a Little Space?

Rebekah Freed

Have you ever had a situation with a friend or family member in which you hit a point in the conversation where one or both of you just needs to hit “pause” and get some space. You need to go to another room and continue the chat at another time. This could be in good situations, but often these things pop up in conflict or hard seasons.

The hope is not to walk away forever, but just for a moment, to take a break, maybe to calm down, to regroup your thoughts before engaging again.

A couple weeks ago I had one of these situations, except it was with God. I had a conversation with a mentor that afternoon that involved some conversations about and with God that were good, but hard. Then, I went to church in the evening and the conversations with God continued as His Word was spoken and we responded in prayer as a group. Individually, the dialogue continued as a I wrestled with what God was up to in a few areas of my life.

As I walked to my car to drive the 40 minutes home, I have to admit, I was at a point like I described above where I just needed to “go to another room” and revisit the conversation with God at another time. We’d been talking for hours at this point and I felt my soul just needed a break. Yet, as soon as that thought crossed my mind, some other words came to mind as well… words from Psalm 139… a psalm filled with words that I’ve been working all year to memorize, to hide in my heart. In this moment though, I stubbornly wished they would have stayed hidden…

Where shall I go from your Spirit?
    Or where shall I flee from your presence?
If I ascend to heaven, you are there!
    If I make my bed in the depths, you are there!

Psalm 139:7-8

Not quite what I wanted to hear in that moment.

You can’t really “go to another room” with the God of the Universe. While I do think God is gracious to give us space when we need it, the other truth is He’s always there whether we like it or not. He can’t not be there. He’s God.

Just like in the situations I described in the first paragraph, even with God I think there are times when some space is good and healthy. Time away can provide opportunity to come back to a conversation refreshed, it calms emotions, and helps us think and communicate more clearly. But in this situation with God, and in some conversations with humans, the desire for space may also be us running away at the first sign of discomfort.

I fully believe God would have been okay with me finding some completely unrelated podcast, distracting myself, and ignoring Him for a while. And later on that night I did give myself some space, but in that moment as I started my drive, I also sensed an invitation before me.

I didn’t like what I was hearing or what my heart was feeling. I didn’t like seeing my sin and struggle. I didn’t like hearing myself name the ways I was feeling disappointed or hurt by God. Even the good parts I just didn’t want to talk about anymore.

Again, I think God would have graciously let me return to the conversation later, but His Spirit also brought those verses to mind as a way of inviting me to stay in that messy hard place. It was a reminder that I didn’t have to get myself together or have my thoughts all figured out before I journeyed further in the conversation with Him.

He was offering to sit with me as I drove home and listen to it all.

He gave a different kind of space. Instead of distance, He provided a safe space to be real and honest and vulnerable. He brought other psalms to mind where the authors were way more confused and scared and upset than I was in that night. He showed me, that even in moments when I wanted to walk away, even if just for a moment, He never would.

In a world where we are quick to dismiss others when the slightest hint of conflict appears…

In a culture where any slight misstep gets you cancelled…

In environments where tension is avoided at all costs and we’d rather write off relationships instead of staying in the hard conversations and sticking in it through to the other side…

In those places, we realize the stark contrast of a God who stays and says, “I will never leave you. I’m not afraid of conflict. I’m not afraid of your anger. I’m not worried by tension. I’m with you. Always. I will see you through to the other side.”

He’ll never push Himself on us, yet, He also won’t give up easily. He’ll show up, again and again.

Whether the fact that God is ever-present feels like a gift or an annoyance today, may it lead your heart into a place of peace. In that space, may you know His hand is leading you, holding you. Always. Forever.

Where can I go from your Spirit?
    Where can I flee from your presence?
If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
    if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.
If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
    if I settle on the far side of the sea,
even there your hand will guide me,
    your right hand will hold me fast. (Psalm 139:7-10)

College Ministry, Lent, Prayer

“Surround Me” – Lent Week 2 Prayer and Scripture Reflection Guide

Rebekah Freed

Series Note: This year I got to write some prayer guides/reflections to be used in Lenten prayer stations in the chapel for the students, faculty, and staff at the university where I work. They are based on sections of Psalm 139 connected with scenes from Jesus’ passion week journey to the cross. I hope to share some of them here.

READ: Psalm 139:5-6

REFLECT:

After supper, Jesus shared some thoughts with his disciples. We hear these final words with his friends throughout John 14-16. See the pictures below to read through some of the things He said. Imagine what it was like for the disciples to be there hearing these words on that night before Jesus’ death.

What thoughts come to mind as you read those things that Jesus said?

After spending some time with those thoughts, read John 17, a final prayer Jesus has with and for his disciples.

In the Psalm, we hear the declaration that God “hems” us in. It gives this image of surrounding us, going before and behind us, protecting us. It seems Jesus is doing that for his disciples as well in His final words of John 17 too.

He’s telling them what to expect.
He’s preparing them.
He’s reminding them of all the things they’ve learned over the last few years together.
Near the end, Jesus turns His attention to His heavenly Father and pleads for Him to protect, unite, and provide for His disciples.

In the final verses of the prayer though, Jesus’ attention turns to “those who will believe in me through their word…” (vs 20)

That’s us!
That’s you!

You are one who now believes in Jesus because of the work of those first disciples!

In those moments, Jesus was already praying for YOU!

To borrow some words from Psalm 139:6, the knowledge of that truly is “too wonderful” for me to comprehend!

PRAY:
Jesus, thank you for going before me, going all the way to the cross.
Today, please go before me in these areas:
(Write down areas where you need God’s protection, provision, or guidance.)
Go before me to lead the way.
Go behind me to protect me.
Sit with me in moments where I can’t even comprehend you.
Surround me.
Amen.

RELATED SCRIPTURES FOR FURTHER STUDY AND REFLECTION:

Exodus 13:21
Hebrews 12:1-3
John 14-16

College Ministry, Lent, Prayer

“Know Me” – Lent Week 1 Prayer and Scripture Reflection Guide

Rebekah Freed

Series Note: This year I got to write some prayer guides/reflections to be used in Lenten prayer stations in the chapel for the students, faculty, and staff at the university where I work. They are based on sections of Psalm 139 connected with scenes from Jesus’ passion week journey to the cross. I hope to share some of them here.

READ: Psalm 139:1-4, John 13

REFLECT:

The first few verses of Psalm 139 recount many details of what God knows.
John 13 reminds of many of the things Jesus knew as well.

Jesus knew that his hour had come.
Jesus knew that the Father had given him power.
Jesus knew what was about to happen in the next few days… his suffering… his death.
Jesus knew that the disciples would all flee.
Jesus knew that Peter would deny him three times.
Jesus knew that Judas would betray him.
Jesus knew.

And still…

Jesus knew all of those things
and still, he served them, washing their feet.

Jesus knew how his disciples would get scared & run
and still he took time to teach them.

Jesus knew how his closest friends would hurt him,
and still he had dinner with them.

God know us, too.

He knows what we’re feeling when we sit in our dorm room or office.
He knows when we’re being honest… or not.
He knows what stresses us out when no one else does.
He knows our deepest needs and our greatest joys.
He knows.

It seems we all long to be seen, to be known.
It’s one of our deepest human desires.
How comforting to hear in Psalm 139 that the God of the universe knows everything about us!
He knows what our future holds even if we don’t.
He knows what we think and feel.

Yet, sometimes to be completely known feels overwhelming or even scary.
Maybe there are things you wish God didn’t know.
Maybe you, like the disciples have run away, denied, or betrayed those you love or even Him.
Maybe being known by God brings shame instead of comfort.

Whatever the case may be today, we find hope in the fact that Jesus knew what His disciples would do and still spent time with them anyway.
The same is true for you.

God knows. Everything.
And still… He loves you.
Enough to die for you.

PRAY:
Even though God already knows everything, He still loves to engage in conversation with us. Spend some time in prayer about the scriptures and reflection provided. Here is one potential prayer prompt:

Jesus, you know (fill in the blank) and still, you love me. Amen.

RELATED SCRIPTURES FOR FURTHER STUDY AND REFLECTION:

1 Corinthians 13:12
John 10:14, 27
Exodus 33:12-17
1 Corinthians 8:3

Lent, Prayer

Known – Lent 2023

Rebekah Freed

As part of my work at the university where I serve, I get the joy this year of helping plan some aspects of our campus-wide journey through Lent alongside our campus pastor and the students of our campus ministry team.

This year Psalm 139 will be the main reflection for all our students, faculty, and staff for the 40 days (plus Sundays) leading up to Easter, focusing specifically on the word “KNOWN”.

What does it mean to be fully known by God?
How can we know his story on an even deeper level?
How can we make Him known through our lives?

When my teammate informed me of this theme near the beginning of the semester it caught my attention because it was a passage I was already planning to explore a lot and try to memorize in 2023.

I’ve had a lot of time the last few weeks to explore this powerful prayer of David on my own and in the process of creating some weekly prayer stations that will be up in our chapel space. Every time I read it, the words get richer and richer. I hope this is a space where I can share some of what I’m learning on my own as well as some of the prayer prompts and reflections I’ve written for my students and teammates.

Each week with the prayer stations we have include a short two word prayer to frame the week. This week’s prayer is “know me” based on the first 4 verses of Psalm 139:

“You have searched me, Lord, and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. Before a word is on my tongue you, Lord, know it completely.”

As I’ve prayed this prayer and explored these verses this week, something struck me:

“Know me” is not only the cry of our hearts to God, but also of His to us.

Here’s a little more about that in a prayer I wrote earlier this week:

“Know me.”
It’s a prayer, but kind of an odd one.

For sure, I desire to be known by You, God, deeply and fully. But it’s odd because it’d be impossible for You not to know me.

As this psalmist recounts You already know me, down to the number of hairs on my head.

You know how I’ve failed You this last week and you know when I’ve faithfully followed.
You know my tears.
You know my joy.
You know things hidden so deep in my heart that I don’t even know them.
You know my fears.
You know my hopes and longings.
You know when my heart explodes with gratitude and celebration.
You know the ways I serve that no one else sees.
You know the ways I sin that no one else sees too.
You know.

And still… you love me.

Perhaps a better prayer this week would be to help me know YOU.

I want to search Your heart and know everything about You!
I want to watch where You sit and rise and know Your thoughts.
I want to travel along where You go and rest when You rest.
I want to know Your word, Your voice, completely, Lord.

Know me this week, Jesus.
Yes I pray that.
But even more, let me know You.
What a wonderful miracle that You allow us to know You.
May we get to the end of this season of Lent able to say we know You more than we do today.
Amen.

Lent

“Save, now!” – A Palm Sunday Reflection

Rebekah Freed

I wake up and I know I need this week to be different. In these days of global pandemic, of soul searching, of anxious uncertainty, I know need this week, this Holy Week, to be one where I lean in and linger long and listen well.

I hit play before my feet hit the floor and the words begin to settle my soul. The podcaster puts aside her own words this week and speaks the Words of Scripture. Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John are her special “guests” today as they begin to tell us what happened in this week thousands of year ago, this Holy Week.

Certain phrases strike me like they never have before:

The crowd gathered.
A simple phrase, yet one in such contrast to our current reality. No crowds will gather on this day, not physically at least. I picture this scene, the complete opposite of social distancing.  

If anyone asks you, “Why are you doing this?” Tell Him, “The Lord needs it…”
I consider the ways God has called me, often to things that don’t make sense to others. In words and actions they ask, “Why are you doing this?” and in reality I, like these disciples untying the donkey, don’t really know. The full picture isn’t clear yet, but this much I do know: the Lord asked; I will obey. The Lord needs it.

He went to the temple, and he looked around at everything.
He sees. Oh, he sees. He sees all the thing that break our heart, they break his as well. We can imagine what he saw that day in the temple… his response to come in the days to follow. In this day, he seems to avoid action, but really, he’s taking it all in and as he does, he weeps.

“If you, even you, had only known on this day what would bring you peace?!?”
Heartbroken, longing to give his people peace, yet seeing all the ways they turn the other way. Downcast heart, I can hear him asking these words to me as well as I flirt with the things that promise peace and give only the opposite.

Do not be afraid, Your king is coming.
Oh, friends, the King is on the way! He is not absent. He is not turning his face away. He came on that first Palm Sunday and he will come again in ALL his glory and there won’t be enough palm branches to wave or coats to lay down to honor him enough.

“If they keep quiet, the stones will cry out.”
The Pharisees, they tried to stop the praise, tried to stop the crowds and the disciples from bringing honor to their King. But when a King comes, one worthy of all honor, glory, and power, the praise can’t be stopped. May I live my life in such a way that I make the stones keep quiet. And so we say, 

Hosanna!
A cry of honor and celebration. Literally, it means “Save, now!”  Yes, this is the collective cry of our hearts this day. Save us! Save us now! Save us as the only One who can. From sin. From disease. From addition. From pride. From broken relationships. From anxiety. From all this and more. Save! Now! Hosanna! Blessed is he who comes in the name of the Lord. 

Hosanna in the Highest! 

palm sunday

Lent

Holy Week Tuesday: Giving Up Hypocrisy

Rebekah Freed

Reading through the events of Tuesday of Holy Week it’s easy for me to get annoyed and even judgmental of the Pharisees, Sadducees, and other religious leaders of the day.  It’s easy for me, on the outside looking in, to think, “They were clearly astonished and amazed by Him, why wouldn’t they just believe?… How could they not see how he was the very One they had been waiting and longing for? … How could they be so rude, arrogant, stubborn?”

Jesus describes their hypocrisy this way:

 “The teachers of religious law and the Pharisees are the official interpreters of the law of Moses. So practice and obey whatever they tell you, but don’t follow their example. For they don’t practice what they teach. They crush people with unbearable religious demands and never lift a finger to ease the burden.  Everything they do is for show. On their arms they wear extra wide prayer boxes with Scripture verses inside, and they wear robes with extra long tassels. And they love to sit at the head table at banquets and in the seats of honor in the synagogues.  They love to receive respectful greetings as they walk in the marketplaces, and to be called ‘Rabbi.’ (Matthew 23:2-7)

Humility is tough. It’s hard to admit that you’re wrong.  What I find fascinating about my own heart, is that while fighting against those who judge others or those who say one thing and do another, I’ve found that I am doing the very thing I’m fighting against.  I may not judge the “sinner” like the Pharisees of our time… but sadly, I can often be found guilty of judging the Pharisees themselves.  In fighting so hard for grace for all, I forget to extend it to those who perhaps need it most… for only once we’ve experienced God’s abundant, life-giving, freeing grace can we then extend it to others.

So today, on this Tuesday of Holy Week, I give up my own hypocrisy.  I give up saying one thing and not actually doing it.  I give up offering judgment instead of grace… to EVERYONE, not just those who I see “worth it”.  I give up doing anything simply “for show”.   I give up thinking I’m better than those who think they’re better than everyone else.  Oh, that pride is a tricky thing!

Keep me humble, Jesus.  As we continue down this road to Calvary and my road through life, keep my eyes focused only on You, not concerned with the people around me, except to offer them grace.  May we be overwhelmed by the freedom that comes in trusting You to be God, and realizing that we don’t have to be.  Help us give up our hypocrisy and, in doing so, be better able to point to You and Your great love for us ALL.
In Jesus’ Name, Amen

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Lent, Prayer

Giving Up Complaining

Rebekah Freed

Lord,

Forgive me when my words are filled with complaints… to You, to others, to no one in particular. Forgive me when I get focused on the things that aren’t going the way I would like or imagine and get my heart focused instead on the many ways in which you have blessed me.  Forgive me Lord when my words which express desire for more or different get in the way of showing the world your abundant grace and joy.  Forgive me for the ways these complaining words have damaged relationships, hurt people, or given an inaccurate picture of You.

I can’t help but be reminded of the Israelites who grumbled their way through the wilderness, longing to go back to Egypt… forgetting the slavery they endured there. (Exodus 16, Numbers 11) Your provided freedom and they grumbled that it took so long.  You provided food and they grumbled that they wanted something different.  You lead them and gave them guidelines to help them live the best life possible and they grumbled.  Lord, I confess I do the same. Forgive me of my grumbling.

Replace my complaining spirit with a spirit of praise… a heart that longs to bless Your name and the many ways You provide for me, lead me, care about me, and use me.  May I not be conformed to the complaining pattern of this world but may my mind be transformed and renewed (Romans 12:1-2). Like Paul, may I learn contentment and praise in every situation, coming to you with any worry, concern, or fear, presenting requests with thanksgiving to Your glory by your grace (Philippians 4).

In the Mercy and Name of Jesus,

Amen… let it be so!

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Lent, Prayer

Giving Up Half-Hearted Prayers

Rebekah Freed

A couple weeks ago I was in the store and decided to buy a baptism card.  That might seem totally normal, except I don’t know anyone being baptized soon.  In short, buying that card was a way to trust that God was going to answer one of my prayers for 2016: that I would get to see the salvation of souls… that I God would make me a disciple that makes disciples. Buying that card was a way for me to tell my heart to trust God that He will answer my prayers for new people to know the love of Jesus this year.

So often we I pray for something to happen, but then don’t actually expect God to come through. Sadly, at times, I pray for things and then find myself shocked when God actually answers.

Today, I give up half-hearted, unexpectant prayers.  When I pray, I’m not checking something off my list… I’m standing in the very presence of the Creator and Sustainer of the Universe!  I’m bringing my praise and my petitions before the One being in all Creation who really can make things happen and LOVES to do it.  I want to learn to pray with persistence and passion, but most of all, with expectation. While God may not come through in the WAYS or the TIMES I might desire or expect, He WILL come through; I can count on that! It’s in His very nature to be faithful to His children even when we’re not.

“…if we are faithless, He remains faithful—
for He cannot deny Himself.” ~ 2 Timothy 2:13

My God will show up and I don’t want to be left surprised. I want to be able to jump up and down, celebrate, saying,
“I knew You’d come through. I knew You’d show up. I knew I could count on You!”

… because we can!

prayer

Lent

Giving Up Waiting for the “Perfect Weather”

Rebekah Freed

Later today I will get a chance to be back on my college campus where I spent 4 of the most formative years of my life thus far. During my sophomore year I was a Resident Assistant on a freshmen girls’ floor. Our Resident Hall Coordinator, Jackie, picked a theme verse for all the RA’s in our dorm to center our year around. One of my most well-worn and favorite t-shirts of all time was our dorm shirt from that year with this verse printed on it:

“Those who wait for perfect weather will never plant seeds.” (Ecclesiastes 11:4) 

Whether it’s in trying something new, sharing our faith with someone near us, asking for forgiveness or having a tough conversation, we often feel the need to watch and wait for the PERFECT opportunitity. Solomon gives us some wisdom here that perhaps the “perfect” time may never come. 

Today is the day to plant. This is the week to sow some seeds. 2016 is the year to stop watching the sky, and to put a plan into place. 

The past few weeks God has been increasingly showing me the urgency of sharing the good news of His love.  It’s scary to think how people might respond but scarier yet is the outcome if I never even try.  I know I won’t get it perfect, but that’s what I love about the amazing grace found in this verse.  By God’s grace I can simply start planting.  

For the sake of accountability, I’m going to put it out there that my neighbor Jordan is one relationship where I feel God telling me to “stop waiting for ‘perfect’ weather”.  He doesn’t know Jesus and that makes me sad.  Unfortunately until recently, not sad enough to do anything about it. Today and the days ahead are each days God is calling me to plant seeds in his life and watch the way he waters and grows them.  We’ll see where God leads, but I think my goal is to talk to him at least once a week these next few weeks and then invite him to one of our services during Holy Week or Easter.  I often make excuses about inviting people on days like that because working in the church I am often super busy on those days as well and wouldn’t have opportunity to be as hospitable as I would like.  This year, I’m choosing to not wait for perfect weather and just see what God does! 

Where can you do some planting today, giving up focusing on the weather and instead focusing on the people right in front of you?!?

Let’s go plant!  

 

Lent

Giving Up Social Media

Rebekah Freed

Many of the things I’ve given up this month have been intangible concepts.   I’ve found though that sometimes there are very tangible things that get me in situations where those feelings, emotions, fears or insecurities I’ve been blogging about the past few weeks are either born or quickly grow. One of those places is through social media and technology in general.

It’s nothing new, we all know it, yet we still feel the need to check our phones every 10 minutes (or 2) just to make sure we don’t miss anything. In reality, by doing that I’ve found myself falling for countless lies that Satan uses to steal kill and destroy my life.

Our insecurities get fueled when we see others who seem to have the picture perfect Pinterest life. We feel that pity-party coming on when we see a friend having a good time …with someone else.  Jealousy tries to join the party as we come across the 18th post about a friend’s Valentine’s Day engagement. We isolate ourselves even more while believing the lie that we are getting connected. And perhaps, one of my biggest struggles, I waste a lot of time, one of the only resources we can’t get more of.

So, while its not a permanent solution, I am going to give up social media for a while.  Maybe just today, maybe longer.  I’m going to choose to ignore how many people read this post.  I’ll refrain today from scrolling through page after page of what my friends are up to, giving up that felt need to “be in the know”.   I’ll block out a few of the things that tempt to fill my mind and heart with unimportant or even unhealthy things.   Oh, there is a lot of good in social media, but sometimes we just need a break and a few extra moments to focus on Jesus. And for me, today is one of those days.

Jesus, use this day away to let me focus in and hear YOUR voice louder than the rest.  Remind me of who I am and who You are.  Help me give up the felt need to be constantly connected to the world around me and be “in the know”, but rather focus on my connection with you. In Jesus’ Name, Amen!

When he has brought out all his own, he goes before them, and the sheep follow him, for they know his voice.  A stranger they will not follow, but they will flee from him, for they do not know the voice of strangers. … The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I [Jesus] came that they may have life and have it abundantly.  I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep.  He who is a hired hand and not a shepherd, who does not own the sheep, sees the wolf coming and leaves the sheep and flees, and the wolf snatches them and scatters them.  He flees because he is a hired hand and cares nothing for the sheep.  I am the good shepherd. I know my own and my own know me,  just as the Father knows me and I know the Father; and I lay down my life for the sheep.  (John 10)

… And yes, this post and any Facebook/Twitter posts related were all written and scheduled BEFORE today. 😉  

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